Here's one to think about

I'll list today's food and then get to my deep thoughts for the day.
B: Out at Classen Grill--scrambled eggs, 4ish ounces of ham, some potatoes, iced tea. I took one taste of the bread and decided it wasn't good enough to be worth it!
L: None, breakfast was really late
S: Cheese stick
D: Steak, 2 roasted roma tomatoes
DS: Tried a whole grain blueberry muffin--I made a ton of muffins to take to the band tomorrow, and an entire pan of mini blueberry muffins stuck. BLAH.

Okay, here's my deep thought:

When I was growing up, I occasionally had episodes of sleep walking/talking/hallucinations. I would have entire conversations with my mother after having fallen asleep. I would also awake with a start after "seeing" a spider on the wall or one coming down from the ceiling.

As I grew up, I had these from time to time. When I lived with my sister in college, I don't recall the hallucinations or sleepwalking being a problem. She was a heavy sleeper so even if they did happen, she probably wouldn't have noticed.

After I moved in with H (still dating at the time), I started having the hallucinations/sleepwalking/talking episodes again. This was my first year teaching, one of the most stressful and awful years of my life. I remember waking up one night, yelling at him about how he "broke the saxophone." He was just sitting there in bewilderment...I think it was the first time I had done that in his presence. I was so embarrassed I broke into tears and ran back to bed.

After we got married, the hallucinations got more frequent. One night, I was so convinced that the "spider" I "saw" on the wall next to the bed was real, I had H check the bedroom and all the sheets before I would go back to bed, like a child. I would awake with a start, and many times I would be across the room before I even knew what I was doing.

It's nice to know I can move that fast if necessary, I guess.

I would also have awful, awful nightmares. One that stuck with me was that there was a hole in the ceiling above our bed, where a light or fan might be (but there wasn't) and snakes were pouring out of it, onto the bed and us. It took H awhile to wake me up from that one; I was thrashing around yelling snakes! snakes! and wouldn't open my eyes. And no, I did not watch Snakes on a Plane that day, nor did that movie scare me in any way.

So, what's so strange, you might be wondering. Ever since we moved into this house, and that has been a solid six months, I have not had any night terrors/hallucinations, nor have I sleepwalked or talked really, other than the jibberish or nonsense talk I make when H comes to bed sometimes. No spiders (and believe me, the real ones reside all over this property...damn lake, blessing and a curse) no snakes, no yelling, no fear, nothing. I have to wonder, why has it suddenly stopped? My life is really no less stressful than it was. Was there bad juju at the apartment?

I just don't know. It's something I've been thinking about for awhile.

I still do have, however, that thing where you start to fall asleep and your body jerks you awake because it thinks it's dying or something. Most recently I did that, and I remember I was thinking about going up some stairs and I caught my foot on one. I jerked so hard in the bed it startled the cat!

If anyone thinks they might have light to shed on this, feel free to comment away!